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Most people want to be more, do more, and achieve more in the year and decade to come. Makes perfect sense, right? The problem is that you focus on the wrong thing to make this all happen. This is how the let’s get healthy ends after the first 30 days of the year. Fitness gyms actually oversell their memberships since they already know a large percentage of people will never last past the 30 day mark.
When you focus on the achievements you want to have, maybe a salary increase, a new car, or maybe fit into your favorite dress or pants again, this is all based on external rewards.
Yet, there is a secret trick that the super successful and fulfilled know.
Achievement comes if you know the underlying reason why it is important to you, the relationships it will affect, or how it will make you feel better in the long run.
To achieve more, you have to grow as an individual first. Yes, read that sentence again. The internal work comes before the external rewards appear. The tree will never bear fruit unless you first plant the seed and then continue to nourish it.
Think about this.
Ten years ago, what was it like to be in your presence? How did you treat yourself? How did you treat others? How would someone else describe your demeanor then? What aspects of you have changed since 2010? Are you a different person now than you were then?
Take a moment and write this down.
Now, let’s dig deeper and put this all together.
Here’s an example to see how this plays out and break this down.
1) Achievement goal: Increase salary by $10k
2) Reason this is important: This will allow you to move into a more spacious home, giving each person in your home more space to relax every evening. Furthermore, this gives you a place to have downtime and not be distracted by others in your home. By having more peace of mind and space to unwind, you will be a more effective spouse, parent, and company employee. (Did you get this final part?)
3) Becoming Goal: Focused attention, Mindful of others, Bold action
Notice what this does. If you stay committed to BEING someone who is (1) Focused, (2) Mindful, and (3) Bold. The internal begets the external.
For this year’s goals, who must you become to achieve your goal?
Wishing you an abundant, joyful and prosperous day!
Lora Polowczuk
Chief Energy Officer
© Priority Retreats International
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Paul’s son, Dylan, a fourteen year old walked in the front door with his head down. Dylan said, Dad, my grades aren’t good. A tear came to his eye wandering if he would get yelled at.
Paul wanted nothing more for his son than to live a better life than he did.
Paul looked straight at his son and asked, what can we do together to change this around?
Dylan slowly raised his head and looked his Dad square in the eye and said, “I need you to believe in me.”
Paul reached for his son and said, “You are far more capable than you realize. You’ve already gone through more schooling than me. I believe you can do anything that you set your mind to go out and do. I believe in you more than you believe in yourself.
Dylan felt relief. A sense of awe wrapped around him. He picked his chin up, smiled and said, “I can do this!”
Instead of bashing another person’s dream, give them the support to booster them forward.
Wishing you an abundant, joyful and prosperous day!
Lora Polowczuk
Chief Energy Officer
© Priority Retreats International
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While communication is evident in almost everything we do, most people never take the time to dial this in. And, even more so, this one aspect of communication takes the most effort.
This is one thing we should all be taught in school, basic to advanced degrees. This aspect can change relationships at home, work, and within your community.
Let’s dive in.
Listening Level 1:
Sue started talking in depth about how she suddenly lost her mother to breast cancer. Sandra interrupted and said me, too. Then proceeded to state what her life has been like since the tragic lost.
Level 1 is about relating someone else’s experience to your own. This often occurs as you start telling what happened to you and completely disregarding what the other person was even saying. The conversations become about you not them.
Listening Level 2:
Bob shares with Bill how his wife cheated on him. Bill states “That sucks, man. I’ve been in your shoes before and its no fun. How can I best support you right now?”
Level 2 is a combination of making the conversation about the other person and yourself. Bill first empathies with Bill then states his own relatable state. It ends what support the other person needs.
It’s listening. And, it is more than hearing words. There is actually three levels.
Listening Level 3:
Lisa discusses with Linda that her child got kicked out of school. Linda replied with, “Lisa, that’s not easy. What support do you or your child require right now to get things back on track? There’s a few programs I can put you in touch with that I already work with. Would you be interested in that?
Level 3 is about making the conversation more global in nature. First, there is an acknowledgement of what happened. Empathy, then what can be done on a more global level.
Bonus tip!
Whether, it’s a political discussion, a religious discussion, or anything where you may have a differing opinion, always seek to understand what makes the other person think that way. Learn to recognize that a difference of beliefs does not make them wrong.
These tips will make any conversation run smoothly and acknowledge the other person. This builds respect for each person.
Want help in this area? Please reach out to me.
Wishing you an abundant, joyful and prosperous day!
Lora Polowczuk
Chief Energy Officer
© Priority Retreats International
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Leo strived everyday to be the best for his company. he was known as the “Get it Done” guy in management. He was known as the guy who could get any project back on track. Yet, at what cost?
While confident in his ability to do anything, how he did it royally pissed people off. His staff felt the need to absorb his verbal out lashes since his track record and building the business soared.
Every year, Leo got huge bonuses and knocked off another accomplishment to his resume.
A new CEO came on board and looked into why certain employees got sick, which in the long run cost the company millions. Most of these employees worked on Leo’s projects. The stress and verbal abuse came at a hidden cost.
The CEO asked Leo, what’s the top three values he strives for in any interaction with his teams. Leo stood their star struck. His body tensed up. He didn’t know what to say. It quickly came up with be on time, budget and resource.
CEO shook his head. That’s the outcome. How do you show up as a person? Are you demanding yet helpful? Are you caring?
Leo relaxed and fell back into the chair. He never thought about this. Leo only thought of himself as the highly sought after Project Lead and husband to his wife.
He mixed up an accomplishment identity for who he really was. He showed up as an unthoughtful jerk ready to steam roll over anyone in his way.
The CEO said your next raise depends on the three words you choose to show up in your interactions with others. You will be rated on if your team believes you show up in this manner.
Too many of us lead with an accomplishment identity and forget who we really are in how we show up everyday.
Real commitment is showing up as your best self. Don’t have an accomplishment identity.
As you plan the next 90 days on your life, career, and relationships, how will you live into your words in how you show up? Do this and you’ll have miraculous results.
Wishing you an abundant, joyful and prosperous day!
Lora Polowczuk
Chief Energy Officer
© Priority Retreats International
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It was December 2017. Dazed and confused, I looked up at the departure board at Denver Airport. After almost four months of travel, leaving every week and a half for a new destination, I could not remember which city I was traveling to this time. I’d been to Seattle, Phoenix, San Jose, San Diego, and even to India twice.
A little voice in my head said, this has got to stop!
With a deep sigh, I asked myself what was the purpose of this trip, hoping it would jog my memory on where I was going.
Yes! Now I remember. I am heading home for an early Christmas on the east coast with my family. Jezz….Definitely a brain fart type of moment.
With a giant smile on my face, I realized this was the last trip I had planned for the year. After the plane took off, I took out my journal.
What do I want in 2018?
1) Identify the root cause of why I was on supplements and get off supplements.
Reason: I was too young to be on all these supplements at my age.
2) Be more selective in my travels.
Reason: I’m more effective if I deep dive in certain areas instead of being spread thin. I decided to only travel for fun for the first three months of 2018.
By April 2018, a team of health practitioners identified the root cause of my underlying health issues, heavy metal toxicity. With faith in non-ordinary treatments and following some strict protocols, I fully got off got off supplements a year and a half later. The universe doesn’t always give you the timeline you want. The more important part was that I got the results I wanted! (More on that story another day.)
The remainder of the year consisted of very selected business travels. I made my health my number 1 priority. I can only serve others when I’m feeling healthy and energetic myself.
What does this mean to you?
The time to plan 2020 is now. As we enter the last month of this decade, it’s more than planning for the next year. It’s about planning for the next decade.
How can you make 2020 the best decade of your life?
For 2020, how can you make 2020 the best year of your life?
“When you take action with a clear intention, the universe will conspire to make it happen.”
This comes down to a simple formula: Intention + Action + Faith = Magical Results
Wishing you an abundant, joyful and prosperous day!
Lora Polowczuk
Chief Energy Officer
© Priority Retreats International
